I Can't Even Fathom The Epic Shit I'd Take After Eating This Epic Eggroll

I think this epic eggroll would probably be the end of my lower intestines. It ain't gonna stop me from trying it but just considering that I already take about 3 explosive shits on any given day, I'm pretty sure this thing would rip through me like the Coors silver bullet train. No question in my mind though that John Falls could take this thing down. Dude orders two meals at a time when he gets take out and was the co-creater of the McMorris. He's built for this.

PS - I basically came in my pants when I saw that huge ass bowl of duck sauce. I'd bathe in that shit if it was socially acceptable.

PSS - This dude giving the play by play is the fuckin worst except for the "we beat with our hands" and the "deep fry that big bitch" lines. Those were pretty good.