T-Higs Just Took the Pure Michigan Contest to a New Level

Just when you thought T-Higs couldn't be any worse, he goes and does something like this...and totally redeems himself.

PS - I'd murder someone for a Colonel K's pastie right now.

Is This MF'er Stealing My Hipster Yooper Look?

Yes, yes he is! This mf'er is stealing my look! You've got hipsters running around absolutely everywhere in NYC and to some extent I've embrassed their bohemian, counter culture. Shit I ride fixie and rock old school nikes harder than anyone, but I've always managed to keep the Yooper flare which I thought set me apart. Well, that was until I saw this a-hole creepin outside the bar with his skinny jeans and his rubber work boots on. I don't care who you are, that look is straight reckless. You gotta be real careful with things like this. I mean I'd like to be pimps from Oakland or cowboys from Arizona, but it's not Halloween. Grow up Peter Pan.

Yoosta Be A Yooper: They see me rolling, they hatin. They trying to catch me riding dirty

Fuckin Yoopers. Just shoveling on their scoot like it ain't no thing. Only thing that could make this picture better would be if he had snow chains on.

Obama Says Ya To Da UP, Eh?

Washington— President Barack Obama will make his first trip to the Upper Peninsula as president — and his first trip to Michigan in six months. The White House is to announce today that Obama will travel to Marquette on Thursday to tout wireless Internet access. He will note that local businesses in Marquette have been able to grow as a result of broadband access, with particular benefit in exporting goods to new markets around the world.

I'm pretty sure Obama thinks the U.P. is a third world country. Just clinging to our religion and dial-up Internet. But let me help you out here bro, forget the WiFi pep rally and figure out how to get us some mother fuckin jobs. I'm just begging to move back to Michigan but the only work I can find is reffing youth hockey. And the real rub is that I let my certification expire so I gotta start over at level 1 doing 6 AM mitey mite games.

PS - I'm taking odds on what kind of pasty Obama eats while he's here. And I'm not talking what brand, cause he's obviously going to Colonel K's in Menominee, but rather what's in it. I got beef and rutabaga.

Is the Eagle Herald promoting violence in sports?

I know that it's hard to ignore the Packers going to the Super Bowl but check out that vicious blindside hit to the head down below. I thought the fucks in the league office were trying to cut down on this shit. I'm not totally shocked that the M&M Thunder are just a bunch of goons these days. But back when I played we at least kissed the other team before we fucked them.

PS - That's a picture of A. Maas who's the son of the chief of officiating. Oh the irony.

Wisco Men Accused of Sexually Assaulting Woman With Snake

EAU CLAIRE — Two northwestern Wisconsin men are accused of sexually assaulting a woman with a live snake. Twenty-four-year-old John Bullock of Altoona and 25-year-old Domonta Jones of Eau Claire pleaded not guilty to the assault Monday in Eau Claire County Circuit Court. Each man is charged with first-degree sexual assault. A criminal complaint says the woman told police she was knocked out in the bedroom of Jones’ home on Nov. 11. When she regained consciousness, Jones was holding her while Bullock assaulted her. She says Jones then got his snake and used it to assault her. Bullock says the sexual contact was consensual. The men are jailed on $30,000 cash.

I'm calling bullshit on this whole story. My friends call me Jack Hanna because of how much animal kingdom knowledge I drop and I'm telling you that this is physically impossible. Snakes are covering in thousands and thousands of scales that link together like a plate of armour. Rub your hand from head to tail and they feel smooth and soft, but got from tail to head and they're rough and almost sharp. Assuming that these guys didn't shove a python head first into this chicks vagina, I'm thinking that it's highly unlikely that she could've taken this thing in tail first. Even with a ton of lube it'd be like getting fucked by the business end of a pineapple. Just not possible.

U.P. Bungee Jumping

Russian Homemade Bungee Jump - Watch more Funny Videos

Pretty sure this is off of the old Lloyd Theatre on 1st street in Menominee.

"The church bell chimed, 'til it rang 29 times for each man on the Edmund Fitzgerald"

Green Bay Press Gazette - Maybe it’s because no one knows for sure exactly what happened. Maybe it’s because so many lives were lost in an instant. Or maybe it’s because of the song. It was 35 years ago today when the Great Lakes freighter Edmund Fitzgerald sank in Lake Superior. A generation has passed. Memories fade. But interest in the “Fitz” still is keen.

“We can’t touch the Fitz exhibit without people getting upset about it. We still get a lot of questions about it.” said Thom Holden, director of the Lake Superior Maritime Museum in Duluth, Minn. Holden said the haunting 1976 Gordon Lightfoot ballad about the wreck is a big part of the intrigue.

The 729-foot freighter left Superior on Nov. 9 with a full load of 26,000 tons of Minnesota-made taconite iron ore pellets just before a huge storm engulfed the region. The ore carrier was on its way to a steel mill at Zug Island near Detroit but sunk in waves that some call the largest they’d ever seen on Lake Superior. All 29 crew members on board perished. Late on the afternoon of the 10th, the captain of the Fitzgerald, Ernest M. McSorely, made radio contact with another ship, the Avafor, and reported that the Fitz was listing badly to one side, had lost both radars, and was taking heavy seas over the deck in one of the “worst seas” he had ever been in. Northwest winds were blowing near 60 mph with higher gusts. At about 4 p.m. an estimated 86 mph hurricane-force northwest wind gust struck the ore carrier Arthur M. Anderson. At 7 p.m. the Anderson, trailing the Fitzgerald by about 10 miles, was struck by two waves estimated at 25 feet or higher. The last radio contact from the Fitzgerald to the Anderson was: “We are holding our own,” about 7:10 p.m. But the Fitz’s lights faded from sight in a snow squall and then disappeared from the Anderson’s radar screen minutes later. No distress signal was sent.

The wreck was found in two pieces 530 feet below the surface just 17 miles outside Whitefish Point and the relative safety and calmer waters of Whitefish Bay.


A Coast Guard investigation ruled the probable cause of the sinking was that the deck hatches failed and water filled the ore-filled cargo holds. This report suggests that the Fitzgerald was taking on water due to earlier damage from the storm and that around 7:15 p.m. it plunged headfirst into a large wave and sank abruptly But findings by the National Transportation Safety Board and the Great Lakes Carriers Association weren’t as sure. Another theory says the ship, unknown to the crew, bottomed out in huge waves on a shoal near Caribou Island, gashing the hull and causing buckling on deck. Other theories include structural deficiencies, overloading, hatches that weren’t properly secured, or just freak wind and wave conditions that doomed the ship.

The men who died in the wreck ranged in age from 21 to 63 and came from seven states. The church bell did chime at the Maritime Church in Detroit for the victims, as Lightfoot immortalized in song, but they also are remembered at Whitefish Point, where surviving family and friends gather each year on the anniversary.

Heart is heavy today. Be sure to listen to Gordon Lightfoot honor the boys and pour some out tonight for the 29 men who lost their lives that fateful night in November 35 years ago today. I'm off to the bar to drink away my sorrows.

As If We Needed Another Reason To Love Kid Rock

Kid Rock - New Music - More Music Videos

I wanna have Kid Rock's babies. Is that gay?

Rare Thighgina Spotted In U.P.

I'm outta words.

Update: This Shit's Weak

A major storm that brought the possibility of widespread damage and tornado touchdowns today petered out by the time it hit metro Detroit and turned out to be no big deal.You might call the forecast overblown – although weather experts say better safe than sorry. Wind gusts in some parts of west Michigan surpassed 70 m.p.h. earlier today. But the storm that some forecasters had compared to the gales of November – as in the storm that sank the Edmund Fitzgerald in 1975 on Lake Superior – were a relative whimper by the time they swept into metro Detroit.

This shit is totally weak. I doubt there were any dudes out wind surfing or building sand castles when the Fitzgerald went down. Every meteorologist on this story should be fired immediately for dishonoring the names of the 29 men who sank into the ruins of her ice water mansion.

Is this the Face of Some Dude who got Mauled by Bears?

PETOSKEY -- Michigan wildlife officers plan to euthanize a "pretty aggressive" bear that mauled a young hunter as he sat in a tree stand last weekend, officials said today. But only if they can trap the female black bear that was with three nearly grown cubs when the attack occurred Saturday. "There have been several other reports of this bear and her cubs wandering around houses, so we have no choice but to err on the side of caution," said Russ Mason, the Department of Natural Resources and Environment's top wildlife official. The cubs are old enough to make it on their own, he said. Chad Fortune, 21, was near Petoskey when the bears appeared at dusk Saturday. Two cubs climbed up his ladder. He knocked both to the ground. Their growls upset their mother, which climbed the tree and bit and clawed Fortune before he beat it away. Fortune said he thought of his fiancé and their 3-month-old twin sons as he furiously fought off the attack. The mother bear eventually retreated, as well and Fortune initially didn't think he was badly injured. "I could feel some blood dripping, but I didn't know how bad I was hurt. I thought at first that it had just kind of scratched me," said Fortune, who could see and hear the bears prowling around 12 feet below him. He said the cubs were 200 pounds or more and the mother at least 400, although he admitted that adrenalin may have made them appear bigger.

Being from the U.P. I have, of course had my fair share of run ins with Ursus Americanus. Bears, to the lay person. Most notably when my Winchester Mag launched an178 grain torpedo straight through the heart of one during my sophomore year of high school. I ate the shit outta that thing and now she hangs in Ann Arbor at Coach & 4 Barber Shop under the watchful eye of Jerry Erickson, the best barber in the world.


But my best bear story was when I was deer hunting from a tree stand and my bro Jmase was sitting directly below me in a ground blind. I don't remember why he was there, maybe he was gonna film the shot or maybe it was just Jarett being Jarett needing some quiet time in the woods, but either way he didn't have a gun. After an hour or so of sitting I heard what sounded like a four wheeler smashing through the woods. You could hear trees snapping and the noise just kept getting closer and closer. But instead of seeing some 15 year old on an ATV come busting out into the clearing I looked up and saw roughly a 350-400 lb black bear come waddling out. This thing could do some serious damage but I wasn't too concerned considering I had a rifle with me. The thing kinda just meandered around for awhile as I threw my gloves and hat at Jarett to try and get his attention. Slowly the bear made its way towards the walking path and got within 40 yards I suddenly remembered Jarett had smeared apples all over the blind to get the sent out. The bear sniffed for a bit and then began walking straight down the path for us. Jarett looked up at me and told me to shoot it if he started messing with the blind. At the time my pops was running for probate judge in menominee and I just remember thinking how I was gonna have to explain to the papers that I shot a bear outta season. Anyway, the bear walked up to the blind and stopped. It looked calmly inside, saw Jarett and froze. I clicked off the safety and saw Jarett cover both his ears. If the bear took one more step I was gonna squeeze one off. But even with all the apple sent in the air and a rather tasty looking Jmase sitting there helpless, the bear calmly continued down the path and into the thick swamp. Obviously that bear knew not to fuck with the Masons.

I Think I Was Stuck Behind This Asshole Last Time I Drove Through The U.P.

Next passing lane in 54 miles.

Bahahahaha! Former Lion Tatum Bell Gets Cut By The Florida Tuskers

PFT.com - Running back Tatum Bell, a one-time 1,000-yard rusher who's nevertheless best known for swiping Rudi Johnson's bags after the Lions signed Johnson and cut Bell, has plenty of experience in getting released by NFL teams. But he'd never previously been dumped by a lesser pro football league. Until today. The UFL has issued its daily transaction report, and the report states that Bell has been cut by the Florida Tuskers.

I need to get ahold of some folks back home cause I'm pretty sure the next step after getting cut by the Florida Tuskers is playing for the Menominee-Marinette Timberjacks of the MSFL. Gonna have to beat out Drew Buyarski for the starting spot though.

Yoosta Be A Yooper: Lions Sisu! Lions Sisu!

Facebook.com - "To show support to the Detroit Lions, Joe Paquette, 63, is walking from his home in Munising, Mi (Upper Peninsula) to the Lions practice facility in downstate Allen Park, 425 miles, bringing the message of “Sisu!” "Sisu", is Finnish for "strength of will, determination, perseverance and acting rationally in the face of adversity. "Once people find out some guy with arthritis in both knees walked all this way, they'll realize he didn't get down there on his own," Paquette said. "We all have Sisu on our side, and the Lions will get Sisu on their side and will have a winning season this year. "Once that happens, we'll be in the Super Bowl," Paquette added. "That's my goal." "Paquette, a Viet Nam veteran of the Army's 4th Division, will be carrying an American flag and his P.O.W. M.I.A. flag on his journey, and will be followed by his brother-in-law." To walk with him or offer words of support please call him at 906-202-2235 between 8am-8pm!

For years I've been trying to figure out what it is that the Lions need. At first I thought it was a GM that didn't get off on only drafting terrible offensive players.



Turns out I was wrong. Then I thought it might be that we needed a wide receiver that valued winning more than making sweet first down celebrations.



Nope, wrong again. Maybe it would've helped to have a QB with better understanding of the field dimensions.



Nah, that didn't do it either. I guess it could've been that we needed a coach who doesn't take the wind instead of the ball in Overtime.



Wrong, wrong, and wrong again. Turns our all we needed this whole time was some fuckin Sisu. And Joe Paquette is only miles away from delivering a serious dose of it to the Lions in Allen Park. If this doesn't qualify Lions' fans as the best in the business then I don't know what does. I mean the day the Lions finally win the Super Bowl will without a doubt be the best day of my life. I get goosebumps even thinking about it. Just listen to the emotion in Joe's voice when he says Sisu will bring us a Super Bowl. Guy means it and as long as we believe it will happen. Not this year or next, but eventually we'll get it and this city will erupt, the state will erupt, and I will erupt. I'm sure that the day the Lady Friend and I finally nail it down will be fantastic and when we pop out some juniors it will be sweet, but the day Stafford leads us to the promise land will be the day I'm okay with death. As much as I'm a diehard Redwings, Pistons, and Tigers fan, they could all be World Champions for the next 10 years and I'd trade them all for a single Lions' Super Bowl. I mean that and I think most Detroit sports fans would say the same.

Lions Sisu!

Hey Bro, There's A Fat Whale On Your Boat

That's right, two Tommy Boy references in as many days. Deal with it. But holy shit eh? This is the type of thing that'll make you never wanna go out on the water again. And with the the Lady Friend and I heading up north this afternoon for the Brown Trout Fishing Derby this story couldn't have come at a worse time.

Jealous Much?

Sorry to keep rubbing my amazing life in the face of the working man, but my pops and I spent all day out on the boat hammering salmon. This is one of the smaller ones I brought in. 'Bout to go beer batter this bitch up and enjoy some more of the easy life. How are those TPS reports everybody?

Who All Seen The Chupacabra Say Yeah!

Chupacabras, literally "goat suckers," are legendary creatures said to roam Mexico, Puerto Rico and parts of the United States. Once called the "Bigfoot of Latino culture," there have been many stories about these unidentified animals. Chupacabras are said to kill livestock and tear them to pieces; they are often portrayed as a cross between a dog and a wolf. Apparent chupacabra sightings spread fear in South Florida in 1996 and Texas in 2008. The chupacabras are in the news again after two strange animals were killed in North Texas. Animal Control Office Frank Hackett described the animal involved in the most recent sightings: "All I know is, it wasn't normal. It was ugly, real ugly. I'm not going to tell no lie on that one." DNA testing is being done to determine the animal's origin. Here is a compilation of chupacabra pictures, various drawings and depictions over the years.

I just got back from my hunting camp after I ran up there to tie up some loose ends before this tornado rips through the U.P. and sat down to find out there is another Chupacabra on the loose. God damn, as if the cougar I'm ducking up here wasn't enough now I gotta worry about some "ugly, real ugly" creature roaming the woods. I guess I'm not too worried though because I don't even really know how to identify this thing. I mean half the girls I run into in Detroit fit this exact description. But I'll tell you what, from now on you better believe that I'm gonna categorize any female that doesn't meet the Mmase standard of approval as, "ugly, real ugly".

And can someone please tell me what the hell is the deal with saying this thing is half dog, half wolf? I'm pretty sure that's called a Siberian Husky. From what I can tell on this 8mm black and white reversal footage this thing is more gremlin than dog. Fuck it, I guess I'm just gonna stay inside until this thing is either eaten by the cougar or gets tossed onto my roof by this tornado.

PS - If the translation of "goat sucker" is anywhere near accurate then I think I should be on the lookout for Tom Green as well.

Yoosta Be A Yooper - I Knew John Stamos Liked The Young Ones

Huffpost - MARQUETTE, Mich. — A woman charged with conspiring to bilk actor John Stamos of hundreds of thousands of dollars had a brief romantic fling with him when she was a 17-year-old high school student during a spring break trip to Florida in 2004, an attorney said Monday.

Coss, 24, and Sippola, 31, both of Marquette, are accused of conspiring to extort $680,000 from Stamos by telling him they had photos of him with cocaine and strippers. The case stated that Stamos, now 46, noticed Coss and another girl at a club, asked friends to bring them over and later invited the star-struck teens to his hotel room. Stamos ordered a drink for Coss even after she told him she was 17.

Two women who worked as strippers eventually showed up in the room with a bag of cocaine, she said, and Coss and her friend took a picture of Stamos bending over a table where the drugs had been laid out. Henderson said Stamos and Coss later kissed on a bed and got into a hot tub together after Stamos undressed and Coss stripped to her underwear. She said Stamos offered to perform oral sex on Coss, but she declined. Stamos eventually became frustrated, broke a bedpost with his hand and left the room before apologizing and inviting Coss to spend the night, which she did.

Blah, blah, blah, Stamos loves young girls. No shit Sherlock, dude made a career outta hanging with pre-teens and I'll be the first to tell you I saw this coming a mile away. You know he was laying the wood on DJ in the wardrobe closet between takes once she hit her kinda hot stage in like season 7.


What I can't believe about this story is that this chick turned down oral from John Stamos. We're talking about Uncle Jesse for fuck's sake, one of Fat Fish Records top recording artists of all time. He's the type of guy that gets honey roasted cashews anytime he wants and if he gets shut down when going down on a chick he'll just karate chop the bedpost in half and get her to spend the night anyway. And no girl in her right mind can listen to "Forever" without soaking their panties straight through. It's just science.



PS - We know Stamos is a perv but someone please tell me that I'm not the only one having impure thoughts about that shot of Rebecca at the 1:38 mark? Have mercy!

Yoosta Be A Yooper: A Lesson In Death Threats

TRAVERSE CITY, Mich. (AP) - Two men have been charged with conspiring to threaten U.S. Rep. Bart Stupak and his family because of the Michigan Democrat's crucial vote for the health care overhaul, federal authorities said Monday. According to an affidavit filed by FBI special agent Travis E. Lloyd, an aide to the congressman picked up a letter addressed to "Stupak family" at the post office in Menominee May 25. Signed, "The Devil within Us," it sharply criticized Stupak for his health care vote. "You, sir, have sold your sole to the devil," it said, adding that "actions have consequences" and asking whether Stupak's wife, Laurie, and son Ken were "prepared for those consequences." It said, "I will paint the Mackinaw Bridge with the blood of you and your family members. I will not say when and with who but I will save your blood for the high towers toward the end of this project. You will live long enough to truly experience the unfortunate but definite consequences of your decision. ... I have the means, the resources, and the commitment ... to fully execute this plan."

Spell check bra, spell check. It's like a resume, one spelling error and your death threat goes back to the bottom of the pile. It's "Mackinac", not "Mackinaw". Common mistake but still inexcusable. And I doubt Bart sold the bottom of his shoe to the devil. It's "soul", not "sole" Other than that, it was pretty well written. I really liked the part about having the means, resources, and commitment to fully execute the plan. Is it wrong if I copy and paste that to the summary section of my resume? I'm trying to get a job at Advantage Rent A Car at Midway Airport and I think they will eat that shit up.

In all seriousness, this is some straight bullshit. As my bro stated early, the Stupak Family is close with the Mason family, and this aggression will not stand man. They think their going to get away with this? Not up in here, Not up in here!!