Is this Gadhafi dude kind of a Pimp?

CAIRO — Libyan leader Moammar Gadhafi vows to fight on and die a "martyr," calling on his supporters to take back the streets from protesters demanding his ouster, shouting and pounding his fist in a furious speech Tuesday on state TV.

Gadhafi, swathed in brown robes and turban, spoke from a podium set up in the entrance of a bombed out building that appeared to be his Tripoli residence hit by U.S. airstrikes in the 1980s and left unrepaired as a monument of defiance. The speech, which appeared to have been taped earlier, was aired on a screen to hundreds of supporters massed in Tripoli's central Green Square.

Shouting in the rambling speech, he declared himself "a warrior" and proclaimed, "Libya wants glory, Libya wants to be at the pinnacle, at the pinnacle of the world."

At times the camera panned out to show a towering gold-colored monument in front of the building, showing a fist crushing a fighter jet with an American flag on it – a view that also gave the strange image of Gadhafi speaking alone from behind a podium in the building's delapidated lobby, with no audience in front of him.

"I am a fighter, a revolutionary from tents ... I will die as a martyr at the end," he said. "I have not yet ordered the use of force, not yet ordered one bullet to be fired ... when i do, everything will burn."

He called on supporters to take to the streets to attack protesters. "You men and women who love Gadhafi ...get out of your homes and fill the streets," he said. "Leave your homes and attack them in their lairs ... Starting tomorrow the cordons will be lifted, go out and fight them. From tonight to tomorrow, all the young men should form local committees for popular security," he said, telling them to wear a green armband to identify themselves. "The Libyan people and the popular revolution will control Libya."

Am I the only one who thinks this Gadhafi guy is kind of a pimp? Not condoning the shithouse rat speech that basically calls for bodega warfare or anything, but I just sweat that he surrounds himself with an army of 50 armed, virgin, female bodyguards and would rather go down in a huge drunken, Hugh Hefner viagra infused orgy with Uzis and AK-47s a'blazin than be taken alive. Fuckin Scarface style except he's not trying to bang his sister.


Oh, and how fuckin bonkers is it that old ass schizophrenia men who were alive when the Holocaust happened are holding the world hostage? Like get a hobby bro. Start banging those bodyguards or take you grandkids fishing but for fuck's sake leave the US out of it cause we're already in like 2 wars and just closed half the schools in Detroit.

Borders on the Verge of Bankruptcy

NEW YORK — Borders Group Inc. may file for bankruptcy reorganization as early as Monday or Tuesday, according to a report in the Wall Street Journal. The No. 2 traditional bookstore in the U.S. also plans to close about 200 of its 674 stores and cut thousands of jobs, the newspaper reported on Friday, citing sources it did not name.

Wanna make some money? Here's an idea. Stop letting all these mooches sit on the floor and read your books for free.

Dude With Mind-Controlled Robotic Prosthetic Arms Wraps His Car Around A Tree And Dies. Shocking

An Austrian man who was the first in Europe to wear an innovative high-tech artificial arm has died after the car he was driving veered off the road and crashed into a tree. Christian Kandlbauer lost both arms in an electrical accident in 2005 but was able to live a largely normal life thanks to a mind-controlled robotic prosthetic left arm and a normal prosthesis in place of his right arm. The 22-year-old died on Thursday, said Andreas Waltensdorfer, a senior physician at a hospital in the southern city of Graz, where Kandlbauer had been in intensive care since Tuesday, the day of the crash. The cause of the crash remains unclear. Both Waltensdorfer and local police said Friday it was impossible to tell whether the accident was caused by problems with Kandlbauer's prosthetic arms.

Did they really just say the cause of death is still unclear? Well then, allow me to play Sherlock Holmes and fill everybody in. Could it be that this dude had two robot arms that were connected to his brain and steering the wheel of a car? Hmmm...just a thought. I mean I can't get my TV remote to work half the time and this robocop is out cruising around thinking nothing can go wrong? Well, let me tell ya, things CAN go wrong, a little rain gets into the elbow joints and the next thing you know you've short circuited while going 60 on the freeway. And...we're done.

Dude Rams Elevator Doors With His Scooter & Then Falls Down The Shaft

Did this dude actually think he was gonna make it in those doors before they closed? Cause he really wasn't even close. Just press the button and wait for the next one dude. I mean you already ride a scooter everywhere, it's not like people are gonna bust your balls for being a few minutes late to a meeting or something. But nope, instead you decide to ram the shit outta the door and have your last idiotic moment on earth go viral. At least he got his 15 minutes. Just too bad he's dead. And yeah, him being dead sucks, but doesn't make this less funny.

PS - He definitely thought he was busting through the door and would get into the actual elevator right? Or was this just some depressed soul committing scootercide?

Man Drugged and Gangraped by Group of Women in Zimbabwe

A ZIMBABWEAN man has accused a gang of three women of kidnapping, drugging and raping him in the fifth sexual attack targeting male victims in under a year. A police spokesman said the 26-year-old was offered a lift in the southern city of Bulawayo but passed out in the vehicle after he was grabbed from behind and his face covered with a cloth. He said he fell unconscious again after being given a substance that tasted like alcohol. "After he woke up he was naked and the ladies took turns to rape him and abused him," police spokesman Wayne Bvudzijena told AFP. "The ladies also took his money, $US300 and cell phone," said Mr Bvudzijena. "The intentions by the three women are not clear but we suspect it could for ritual purposes."

The incident on Friday was the fifth such attack reported in several parts of the country, carried out by groups of women of varying size. "It could be one or more gangs involved which is doing this. In all cases the victims are caught unaware and they are given drugs which make them dizzy," said Mr Bvudzijena. "A docket for aggravated assault has since been opened in these cases." The first attack happened last November when three women kidnapped an 18-year-old man, the state-run Herald newspaper reported. In February, a group of four women forced a 25-year-old to have sex with them at gunpoint. Last month, a 44-year-old man, who was ordered to wear a condom, was targeted by two women while a man stood guard. A 30-year-old man was also drugged by three women, two of whom had guns, and sexually assaulted. Under Zimbabwean law, the charge of rape applies only to women victims.

Anyone feel like taking a trip to Zimbabwe? My luck I'd get raped by the group of chicks who made the dude wear a condom. FML.

PS - I think I found a loophole in Zimbabwe's legal system. Chicks raping dudes isn't a crime?! Shit, Chyna from the WWE could rule that country like Attila The Hun with her mangina.