Chupacabras, literally "goat suckers," are legendary creatures said to roam Mexico, Puerto Rico and parts of the United States. Once called the "Bigfoot of Latino culture," there have been many stories about these unidentified animals. Chupacabras are said to kill livestock and tear them to pieces; they are often portrayed as a cross between a dog and a wolf. Apparent chupacabra sightings spread fear in South Florida in 1996 and Texas in 2008. The chupacabras are in the news again after two strange animals were killed in North Texas. Animal Control Office Frank Hackett described the animal involved in the most recent sightings: "All I know is, it wasn't normal. It was ugly, real ugly. I'm not going to tell no lie on that one." DNA testing is being done to determine the animal's origin. Here is a compilation of chupacabra pictures, various drawings and depictions over the years.
I just got back from my hunting camp after I ran up there to tie up some loose ends before this tornado rips through the U.P. and sat down to find out there is another Chupacabra on the loose. God damn, as if the cougar I'm ducking up here wasn't enough now I gotta worry about some "ugly, real ugly" creature roaming the woods. I guess I'm not too worried though because I don't even really know how to identify this thing. I mean half the girls I run into in Detroit fit this exact description. But I'll tell you what, from now on you better believe that I'm gonna categorize any female that doesn't meet the Mmase standard of approval as, "ugly, real ugly".
And can someone please tell me what the hell is the deal with saying this thing is half dog, half wolf? I'm pretty sure that's called a Siberian Husky. From what I can tell on this 8mm black and white reversal footage this thing is more gremlin than dog. Fuck it, I guess I'm just gonna stay inside until this thing is either eaten by the cougar or gets tossed onto my roof by this tornado.
PS - If the translation of "goat sucker" is anywhere near accurate then I think I should be on the lookout for Tom Green as well.
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