Buckle up everybody, cause I'm about to fuck you up with some truth. This "Pure Michigan" campaign that everyone loves so much has straight run its course. To find a more pathetic representative of the state you'd have to go down to Ford Field on Sunday. And this is coming from one of the people who used to be all about the "Pure Michigan" slogan. But after seeing this shit I'm about two seconds away from making Tim Allen an offer of 100 Coney dogs to come over to JBS.
Seriously look at this gear and tell me these assholes aren't joking. The geniuses who thought it was a good idea to charge $22 for an adjustable hat that looks like something a lunch lady would wear are the #1 reason this state is going under. No one in their right mind would buy one of these things. Meanwhile I come out with a hat so fuckin hot that my inbox is overrun with stories from the satisfied customers about all the threesomes that it keeps getting them into. In fact the only real excuse to not have a Joeyblueskies.com hat is if you hate vagina. Do you hate vagina? I didn't think so. Email lamborghiniliving@gmail.com and buy one now.
PS - If you honestly hate vagina it's okay cause the hat looks great on straight chicks and gay dudes too.
PSS - I wonder where they got the idea for the state outline from? F'n douche bags.
The T shirt is actually pretty sweet. I mean It even takes into accoutn Isle Royale and the beaver islands. So dont hate Matt. And I doubt this is even competition. They're pushing pure Michigan in Michigan which I think was their biggest mistake. Youve got the "I went to Michigan but Im from New Jersey (Oy!) but I want to represent my university now that theyre legit at football" market all to yourself out here in NY.
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