Mike Modano is scheduled to be introduced by the Detroit Red Wings as their newest acquisition in a news conference at 2:30 p.m. Friday at Joe Louis Arena. He and the Wings have agreed to a one-year deal, believed to be worth around $1.25 million. He’s being brought in to center the third line, between wingers Jiri Hudler and Dan Cleary. Modano, 40, will add scoring power (he has 557 goals and 802 assists in 1,459 NHL games), depth and veteran leadership (he’s a former captain of the Dallas Stars, the franchise for which he played 20 seasons). In addition to centering the third line, he’ll also play the point on the second power-play unit.
Besides the fact that the Modano signing means Hockeytown is undoubtedly getting another visit from old Stanley, it more importantly means we'll have the pleasure of staring at Willa Ford's smoking ass all winter long. And unlike most sporting wives who go into hibernation, she's in the business of showing that moneymaker off so we can probably count on some type of Kid Rock & Willa Ford sex tape come December. I just can't wait for Modano to drop 20 goals and 35 assists on our third line. Shit is gonna be laughable when the Hawks can't even get that type of production outta anyone on the second line. This shit is seriously gonna be easier than it's ever been before. Fuck fighting for the 8 spot next year, we could bring back Gordie Howe to to play center on the fourth line and still win the Presidents' Trophy. And even if all goes bad and he blows out his knee in the first week, this ass is still worth 1.25 million easy.
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