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Friday, June 25, 2010

Introducing Rob-a-car Cissoko


Ann Arbor -- Boubacar Cissoko, once perceived as the cornerback who would help solidify the Michigan defense, faces a maximum of 45 years in prison after pleading guilty Wednesday to four robbery charges in Washtenaw County Circuit Court.

"I had a pellet gun, when he pulled up in the back of the building," Cissoko, 22, testified about robbing a taxicab driver April 18 in Ann Arbor. "I put the gun in his face.

"I looked at his face. He was really scared," he testified, about deciding to abort the robbery. "Then, I left on my own free will."

Charged originally with attempting to rob the driver while armed, Cissoko pled guilty to a lesser charge of assault with intent to rob, which carries a 15-year sentence. He also admitted three charges of larceny from a person. Cissoko testified that he lured pizza and sandwich delivery men to his door in Ann Arbor March 13 and snatched wads of cash from their hands, as they made change for his purchase. The third larceny occurred in Ypsilanti, when Cissoko snatched cash from another cabbie.

The admitted crime spree began five months after coach Rich Rodriguez dismissed him from the team in October for twice violating team rules.

Cissoko was but a few miles from Michigan Stadium on Wednesday, in the Washtenaw County Courthouse. But it might as well have been in another world. Handcuffed, feet shackled and wearing a green prisoner's jump suit, he spent several minutes before the hearing slumping at the defense table, his hands folded before his face, thumbs set along the sides of his nose, with the tips resting against his eyes. He was alone in the courtroom, except for his public defender.

"I was going through a tough time, and what I did was bad," Cissoko testified.

Born in Ghana, Cissoko graduated from Cass Tech in Detroit ranked as high as third in the nation at his position. But he has been in jail in lieu of $70,000 bail since April 18, when police arrested him.

While he faces 45 years, Cissoko's term is likely to be considerably less. Defendants routinely serve such sentences simultaneously, rather than consecutively -- especially when they plead guilty. Circuit Judge Archie Brown will sentence Cissoko Aug. 10.

Michigan recruited Cissoko in 2007, under former coach Lloyd Carr.

The team violations were never disclosed, but people who know Cissoko said he repeatedly missed classes, workouts and study sessions.

"On and off the field, there are certain rules they have to follow, and players understand that," Rodriguez said in October. "It's never pleasant to have to do this, but as I told the team, all I do is enforce the decisions they make."



I'm going to cut Boubacar some slack here. I mean he never really reached the top? This isn't exactly Charles Woodson holding up Jet's Pizza. He was the shittiest starting corner on the shittiest team in UofM history. That's like be okay at Eastern Michigan. And I see okay players at Eastern pull this shit everyday. And the way these Jimmy John drivers faunt their cash, their begging you to snatch that shit. I'm 185 lbs of pure love handles and I have to stop myself everytime from gloving saving that cash right out their hands and telling them skinny emos to fuck off. If I was Boubacar, I would be doing that shit on the reg. Sucks for him that he's going to have to watch his homeland Ghana get shit pumped by USA tomorrow. Can't imagine that will be an easy day for his asshole in the slammer.

Another reason why I feel for this guy, I've had a similiar fall from grace myself. In 8th grade I was voted most popular male. I was rocking cargo khakis, knit sweaters, hemp necklaces, gel'n my hair, and grabbing ass like whoa at every school dance. My favorite song was Celine Dion "my heart will go one" cause they played that shit twice a dance and it was a given your hands went straight to ass on the first note. KC and Jojo was the only artist that could make that happen. I had a new girlfriend every 2 weeks and once successfully traded girlfriends with my boy Scott Miller. For you Memominee folks, it was melissa beaudo for aina hendrickson straight ask. I'll let you decide you got the better end of that deal.

4 years later I was a senior in highschool. I wore mesh shorts and one pair of jeans all year. I had a mullet as a joke and kept it all year long. I got zero ass and begged girls to give me blowjobs on msn messenger. I woo'd the shit out of chelsea liberty tho, but shit the bed when i wasn't behind my keyboard. So I know what your going through Boubacar. Your jail time won't be that bad, and when you get out, I'm pretty sure YpsiArbor Lanes is hiring. You'll be back on top before you know it. Look at me, telemarketing and blogging...sometime's you just gotta say what the fuck.

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