How Much Middle School Ass Does This Kid Get?

Take a look at this Andy Dufresne wannabe mother fucker. I mean this is some straight Shawshank shit. Nobody could've seen this coming, nobody. I had this kid pegged as a no potential loser all the way, but then outta nowhere he gives a little lean to the right to make sure the camera is live and BOOOOOOOOOOM! Kid just skeet, skeet, skeets every ounce of swag he has all over a national tv audience. Think I'm gonna need some help picking my jaw up off the floor. It's just like the first time I saw the Warden throw that rock through the Rita Hayworth poster and it clangs off the pipes all the way down the tunnel. Goosebumps for fuckin days.

Someone Get Me This Chicks Name. We Need to be Facebook Friends Like Yesterday

I knew the Wings were gonna win their 20th in a row at home against the Flyers tonight the second I saw this smoke skate out and scoop up that octopus raw dog. Cause if there is anything we all know it's that hot chicks love winners, not losers from Philly. Straight science.

PS - BMase needs to get the hell outta my head. Literally sent me this pic two seconds later.

I'm Pretty Sure Cyndi Lauper is Benjamin Button

I think this chick is straight aging in reverse cause this just doesn't make any fuckin sense. There's no chance I lay a finger on 1984 Cyndi Lauper but somehow 28 years later I wanna give her a money shot more than life itself. Weird.

Maize Rage Might Be the Most Homely Student Section in all of College Basketball

I dare anyone, man or woman, to find a single fuckable person in the entire Maize Rage. Just take a look at this picture, it's like a Where's Waldo book. I mean there's that one bitch in the upper right corner with the low cut shirt who some desperado might put it in after a night at Rick's but I'm guessing she's probably the only person in this entire section that's even had sex before.

Alert the Press: Wabash College Over the Shoulder Shot Goes Down vs Kenyon College

I've got two observations. First off, I was at a middle school basketball game in Denver today and there were seriously more fans in attendance. I don't really care if you're a D-III school you gotta represent way harder than this. I mean my high school football team had more fans downstate this year than the Kenyon/Wabash crowd combined. Side note - I'm hard looking at that powerhouse backfield.


And two, as a coach you have to hate this shot selection. Don't care if the shot clock is running down you still have to pivot and square your shoulders. Maybe that's just me, but I'm all about fundamentals. Probably would've thrown a fire extinguisher at this kid's head in the locker room.

Karl Ravech Tweets Cabrera Has Dropped 25 Pounds

(@karlravechespn)
Alex Avila joins bbtn at 330et says he's working out with Cabrera and that Cabrera has lost 25 pounds and is excited about moving to 3rd

Joeyblueskies.com photographers were fortunate enough to capture this shot of him playing some winter ball in Venezuela last week. Dude looks lean.

Homer Gets Sled from Teammates for 1000th NHL Game

Great gesture by the classiest group of athletes in all of sports. One question though, why a Ski-Doo? Always saw Homer as more of a Polaris man. A Ski-Doo is more of something you'd get this flamer.