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Tuesday, September 28, 2010

A.O.L. - Ripped Jeans


Jesus, Mary and Joseph wearing Def Leppard jeans! I can now die a happy man cause this is the mother of all A.O.L.s. Do people actually go out dressed like this? And if so, where? I mean I run my ass all over the biggest city in the US day after day and I've never in my wildest dreams ever come across anything like this. That little bit of butt crack she's showing is lethal. Only thing that would turn me on more is if she had a tramp stamp of the Lions logo. Maybe e$ can photoshop that shit for the next JBS banner.

This ass belongs in an ass museum. It's a fuckin Picasso and just one of the absolute greats that's too sexy to even fuck with. I mean if I ever found myself tangled with this ass I'd have a hard time not exploding into every one of the holes she has in those jeans. Ass Score - 10.0

Bagging monster ass like this is all about opportunity and when you see a 10 point ass walk out in front of you, it's real easy to get ass fever. Keeping a steady aim on this ain't easy. Nice huntin. Pic score - 9.5

Monday, September 27, 2010

Is This The Mugshot Of A Dude Who Got Tricked Into Getting A 93.5 Tat On His Forehead


When a deejay offered six figures for a forehead tattoo, David Jonathan Winkelman did it—and then everyone laughed at him and said it was a joke. Now he has to relive the humiliation with a mugshot gone viral. Winkelman became a human billboard for the radio station KORB in late-2000 after a disc jockey offered listeners a six-figure payout if they tattooed the FM station's call letters and logo on their forehead. Winkelman and his stepson, Richard Goddard, went to a local tattoo parlor and each emerged with forehead ink promoting "93 Rock," the "Quad City Rocker." Of course, when the men came calling for the cash, station brass explained that the offer was a practical joke, just a wacky radio stunt. Winkelman and his relative sued, claiming that the station sought to have listeners permanently marked so that they "could be publicly scorned and ridiculed for their greed and lack of common good sense." Both complaints were eventually dismissed. KORB has since switched to an "adult contemporary" format and has changed its call letters to KQCS, or "Star 93.5: Today's Best Variety." Arrested last week for failing to appear in court over a misdemeanor charge for operating a motor vehicle without the owner's consent, Winkelman's awkward mug shot reawakened his decade-old humiliation of yore.

So yeah this story is like 10 years old, but any time this guy gets arrested for the rest of his life I'm gonna bring this shit back up. Cause I don't care how redneck you are, you need to do a little more research into the payment method before you go getting branded square in the face with some dick jockey's logo. And how is it that this dude's lawyer couldn't milk a dime outta this thing. You best believe I'd be bringing in Jackie Chiles and I'd come outta this one with at least 5 million for my discomfort. But besides getting no money for any of this, the worst part about this whole thing is that 93.5 switched to some adult contemporary bullshit and lost this guys street cred forever. Have fun getting hit on by Kenny G fans the rest of your life.

Delmas Said It Best


Best getting hurt, refs bending us over, Peterson running for 80 yards at a pop. Just Lions football at its finest.

Lions Confined By A Combination of Terrible Officiating, Constant Injuries, and Poor Execution


What a freakin nightmare. And I don't mean the way the Lions are playing these days. No, I'm talking about the way that absolutely nothing can go right. The amount of injuries to key guys is absolutely absurd. I mean you aren't gonna win many games when you throw two critical redzone picks and give up an 80 yard touchdown run, but their isn't a team in the league that could compete without their starting quarterback, their starting middle linebacker, their starting outside linebacker, without their #2 wideout, an injured running back, and a dinged up starting safety? Plus you pile on the excruciatingly terrible officiating that we've had thus far and it's the perfect storm of shit.

And as much as people are gonna want to call Lions fans a bunch of whining bitches, it ain't gonna keep me from bitching. Ed Hochuli should be wearing a big red nose and huge ass shoes out there cause the guy is a fuckin clown. He should've handed over his paycheck when this one was done because he let Brett Favre control that entire game. I mean I knew Favre was the quarterback and the coach of the Vikings, but when did they start letting him referee too? That shit was embarrassing. Favre would throw an incomplete pass and then just point at the play and the refs couldn't get their flags out fast enough. And not only was Favre getting absolutely any call that was close, the Lions were having first down conversions in the redzone brought back on phantom holding calls. The one backwards pass that Favre threw and they called incomplete was so beyond egregious. Had that been the Lions, they would've 100% continued on with the play and checked on it after the fact but since it was Favre it was immediately blown dead. I mean if we go out there and lose on our own lack of skill and execution I'm fine with that, but for fuck's sake, stop stealing shit from us.

Now, the Lions themselves played pretty bad and regardless of the officiating they would've lost in the end. You can't muff punts and expect to win. You can't blow tackles and expect to win. And you can't lackluster play calling and terrible clock management and expect to win. Seriously WTF was up with them not spiking the ball so they could get another shot or two at the endzone before half? That shit isn't difficult, in fact it's coaching 101. Sometimes it even seemed like the Lions conceded the ball as soon as they got it. A couple of those 3 and outs took 20 something seconds off the clock. It's getting fuckin brutal to watch.

But on the bright side, I was impressed with the offensive line as they only allowed one sack against the Vikings which is something to hang your hat on. Not to mention they came to the aid of Hill when Ed Hochuli completely lost control and let the Vikings start throwing punches in between plays. Mid game I even found myself raving about how the Lions had kept Peterson in check all day and then he busted that one for 80 yards. Spoke a little too soon on that one.

Bottom line is that the Lions would only be 1-2 at this point anyway so being 0-3 isn't that shocking. What's more shocking to me is that with everyone healthy, I think we actually would've had a shot at being 3-0. I was a 5 win guy all along and I was never thinking playoffs like some of the slappys out there. So take this season for what its worth. As much as karma continues to fuck us, we're not the "same old Lions". This team can play defense, sort of. This team can run the ball, sort of. And this team has leaders who know the game, sort of. It's just extremely frustrating to have to wait another season to see these young guys grow up. I don't have many more seasons like this left in me.

Be Patient...It's coming.



I don't have a freakin clue what these homies are doing but I can't believe BMOC and I didn't' get into this shit when we were young. Had I known about this growing up there would've been craters up and down 38th ave. I mean it looks like they're just taping giant sidewalk chalk to the end of sludge hammers and then smashing it. Fuckin science man. Pretty awesome shit. Well, at least until you use way too much chalk and rip both your arms off. That's when science kinda sucks.

Morning Wood with Grace Park


I'm in the mood for some Chinese this morning. Grace is a 36 year old actress who's best work came when she played an Asian dancer in the movie Romeo Must Die. Oh, and she's also in the new Hawaii Five-O remake. Enjoy















Friday, September 24, 2010

Waste of Life






I wish Teresa Lewis and Lindsay Lohan pulled a Freaky Friday before Teresa's execution.